LIBBY FOUND INNOCENT!
Just in time for the Fourth of July, former chief of staff for the vice-president of the United States I. Lewis Scooter Libby has been exonerated by a jury. A jury of the only peer that really matters: The President of the United States. President Bush gave a fully commuted pardon to Libby who was sentenced to 2 and 1/2 years to life for his role in exposing the lies of former counter-US intelligence agent Joe Wilson and his scheming wife Valerie Plame. Like Boris and Natasha with so many of their cartoon bombs, the dastardly pair attempted to destroy the entire US Intelligence community from within by defending the brutal actions of Saddam Hussein and his 9-11 cohort Osama Bin Laden in the run up to Operation Iraqi Freedom.
The Liberal vultures who run the mainstream media have overreacted to the point of torch-mobbery in their response to an innocent patriot walking free. In a pile-on of overwhelming mendacity, the press has called for every measure of punishment not for Libby, but the President, ranging from impeachment to full-blown assassination. However, legal experts point out that the only crime they can accuse the President of committing is of knowing an innocent member of his own administration when he sees one.
On the other side of the morality spectrum, Libby's supporters celebrated justice well done in a case in which the highest ranking White House official was ordered to jail since the Iran-Contra affair when Oliver North was imprisoned for secretly making charitable military donations to under privileged countries in need.
The Democrats in "Congress" reacted as though Libby had been pardoned for killing his pregnant wife. In reality, Libby still has to face extremely harsh penalties including two years to life of probation, an unholy fine of $250,000 dollars, and the shame of being labeled a guilty man for the rest of his life. As President Bush compassionately said, "The consequences of his felony conviction on his formal life as a lawyer, public servant, and private citizen will be long lasting."
PLN legal expert Mike Reis offers a more candid assessment of Libby's future prospects stating, "This is a broken man. Probation is like a death camp, the $250,000 fine is something a humble public servant will never bounce back from, not to mention the fact that he will never find work again in any field, ever."
To add insult to life crippling injury, top legal experts accross the country have come to the conclusion that THERE WAS NO CRIME. Since there was no crime many are saying that any sentence imposed would be, as President Bush called it, "excessive". End of story.
Now with all this Scooter Libby business out of the way we at can all start asking some real questions like:
What was Joe Wilson doing in Niger, really???
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